Why you need a tribe for motherhood and who needs a membership
So I'm sure you've seen the phrases tribe and village when describing a group of women who are mothers and showing solidarity in motherhood. It's cute, trendy and all over social media. Where did these phrases come from and why are they popping up everywhere.
Indigenous peoples all over the world have referred to groupings of people as tribes and or villages. African tribes are legendary for their ability to create community anywhere on earth and maintain tribal lineage through the usage of song, style of dress, language, births and religion.
When creating your own motherhood village think about who makes you literally feels the best. Who can you depend on in an emergency? Who besides your partner can provide labor support in the event your partner is unwilling or unable to? Who can you call to come over during the post partum period when all you want to do is eat, shower then sleep?
Here's my list of mandatory village members and their roles:
Husband- He is my labor support, my errand runner, my epidural seeker and of course my love.
Mother- Grandkid watcher, food prepper and photographer post birth and at every function with the kids.
Breastfeeding support- Lactation consultant. She legit saved my nipples and made breastfeeding so much easier. I'm certain I would have given up on her. You can find more information on her at www.latchbf.com.
Girlfriends whose birth and post partum philosophy is in line with yours- This is very personal. All women do not birth and feed their babies the same way. We must always be respectful and supportive of the choices women make. Motherhood is hard enough without your judgy opinions over another woman's choice. So to that I say, if you plan to breastfeed share the experience with your girlfriend who breastfed. If you want a medication free birth discuss this with someone who understands pain as a process and is supportive of your choice. Pregnancy is not the time to solicit opinions from those who have not walked the talk. Trust me you'll get those opinions anyway.
Who gets a membership?